The Bell still rings for those who truly Believe

Alternate Title: When your oldest child tells you they know the truth about Santa.

I knew it was bound to happen, but it still threw me off guard.

Earlier this Fall, I was driving Kate to youth group and as soon as we were backing out of the driveway, she exclaimed:

"We need to talk! I know the Tooth Fairy isn't real! I lost my tooth 3 days ago & never told you. The Tooth Fairy never came because it's YOU!!!"

And then she started laughing. 
She was so proud & thought she was so cool for figuring this out.

I was a bit taken aback & my mouth was gaped open. Before I was able to say anything, she shouted from the back seat "And, I know Santa's not real either!!!!" 

I felt like I had been punched in the gut.
And that's when the tears started rolling down my face.

It was the end of an era for Kate.

It was a good run. She will be 11 in January...for almost 11 years she believed.
I mean, she is a 5th grader...this is around the time when they find out the truth.

As the tears were falling down my face, I kept driving, took a deep breath and told her that she could not spoil it for her friends or siblings and we would we would talk more about it when she got home from youth group.

The tears were because I was mourning the loss of the innocence & magic of childhood. 

She is growing up up which is so fun to see the person & young adult she is becoming, but at the same time I wish I could freeze time and keep my kids little forever.

While she was at youth group I went to my computer because I had bookmarked some websites about what to tell your kids when they ask about Santa, etc.

One of the posts was this letter,  so I tweaked it and personalized it to Kate.

When she got home from youth group we waited until Claire & Luke were asleep and then we chatted with Kate and gave her this letter:

Dear Kate,

Thank you for sharing your discoveries & questions about The Tooth Fairy and Santa.

I know you've wanted the answer to this question, and we always want to be honest with you.

The answer is no. I am not Santa. Daddy is not Santa. There is no one Santa.

We are the people who fill your stockings with presents and pick out fun surprise. The trampoline that Santa brought 2 years ago was one of our favorite surprises EVER.

I imagine you will someday do this for your children, and I know you will love seeing them run down the stairs on Christmas morning. You will love seeing them sit under the tree, their faces lit with Christmas lights. Seeing Christmas through your children's eyes is magical.

This won't make you Santa, though.

Santa is not the reason for Christmas.  We have taught you that the true meaning of Christmas is the birth of Christ and celebrating Jesus’ birthday. This is the true and only meaning of Christmas. Sure, Santa is fun & exciting, but it is just a small part of the Christmas season.

With big hearts, people like Daddy and me take our turns helping Santa do a job that would otherwise be impossible. The job of creating fun Christmas morning memories and a magical childhood for you to look back on with a smile. Hopefully these memories will always remind you of how much we love you, care for you and want the best for you.

So, no, we are not Santa. Santa is love & magic. Excitement and surprise.  I'm on his team, so is Daddy and now you are, too. Now it’s your turn to help us continue being Santa for Claire & Luke and your younger cousins.

We are sad you are growing up, but we are excited to have you on our team helping spread the Christmas magic to others. 
We love you and always will.

Love,
Mommy & Daddy

P.S. Gramma always says….”If you don’t believe, you won’t receive.” We still believe in the magic of Christmas morning & hope you will too. I hope you keep hearing the bell. May you always believe…and remember that it is better to give than receive. 

So, feel free to use this & tweak this letter for when your kids start asking you about Santa.

Last week I gave Kate this ornament. (I got it HERE)

  If you've seen Polar Express you will understand the significance of this bell & hearing it ring.

I ordered ones for Claire & Luke also, so when it comes time to give them a letter, I will have this Believe bell ornament to go with it.

I want to make sure they always hear the bell ringing. 

So, here we are at Christmas....our first Christmas when one of our kids knows the truth about Santa.

It feels....different. Although I know it shouldn't. It's not a "bad different" It's more of "my kids are growing up and this is making me sad different". 

I have to say, Kate has been incredible...you would never know that she knows "the truth".  She went to see Santa with her siblings & cousins with a smile on her face. She told Santa what she wanted. Each morning, she runs around the house with Claire & Luke trying to see who can find the Elf first. She is doing her job & doing it well.

Thank you Kate for keeping the magic alive in our home.

We had a decade of magical Christmases where all our kids could hear the bell ring. 

It's still ringing, it just has a different sound....a different ring tone.

It's bittersweet, for sure.